I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
