i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
this hospital has no fireball
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
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