dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
