it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
