I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Randomize
