At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
