i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
