Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Send help, water and tortillas.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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