what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
