remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
I did not marry a roomba.
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