I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
