i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
