I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Randomize