We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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