You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Randomize