You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
