Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Randomize
