is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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