He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Randomize
