I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
