im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
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