Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
