all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
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