God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize