On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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