suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
