on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Let's paint friendship bongs
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
