im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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