you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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