Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
