You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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