I think I just saw someone hide a body.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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