It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
