Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
