p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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