i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize