I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize