No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
