would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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