your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
