She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
