can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I just cut my nipple shaving
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
