I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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