Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
