I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
