White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
