Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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