Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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