I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
