turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
the liver wants what the liver wants
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize