it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
