Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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